Finding Tantra Thru Magick
There were a lot of things I thought I would learn through magick when I first started practicing. Discovering my divine path towards tantra was not one of them. I was occupied with my meditations, and moving energy with my mind, and living authentically in the beginning. I wanted to get my mind in the right place to become a witch. Then I came across sex magic.
Sex magic is a part of witchcraft that uses the power of orgasms and sexual energy to launch your manifestations into the universe even harder (hehe, harder). The book I was reading glossed quickly over this topic. But I needed to hit the brakes! You can't just tell me some super hot magick like that, then not give me all the details! So I jumped online, and after finding some questionable sex sites (careful what you google!), I found this thing called Tantra.
We were still in lockdown from the pandemic, so I had a lot of time to read! I ordered my first Tantra book: Urban Tantra by Barbara Carellas. I specifically wanted a book that had exercises to try and explained a lot but was easy to understand and inclusive. This book delivered. I remember being so giddy when I first started reading it. I jumped into every exercise I could and immediately started feeling the energy!
Witchcraft definitely helped me understand and connect with tantra from the beginning. They both share so many things. Especially the movement of energy around the body, commitment to meditation, and surrendering to the universe. Magick was tantra, and tantra was magick to me.
I had just started dating a new guy when I got into tantra. I remember on our third date I asked him if he would be interested in trying some tantra techniques. He immediately said yes, then started asking questions. He had never heard of it, but bless his sweet face, he would literally try anything with me! We were into kink, as well. And we were both poly, already. I had another girlfriend at the time, and he had some other kink partners. But together we wanted to explore tantra.
We had an immediate connection to each other, and this connection was deepened just by having conversations about tantra. We would talk for hours about spirituality, and the universe, and magick, and intention, and death, and religion, and politics. He is more of a skeptic, but my depth of knowledge and ability to say "I don't know" made it easy for him to keep talking. I still laugh when I remember we were trying to figure out if it was pronounced tan-tra, or tawn-tra. I watched many youtube videos from a variety of creators before I decided we would pronounce it tawn-tra.
After exploring some of the higher level tantra practices through conversation, we began trying more of the physical levels in tantra together, and that's when I really started to see the benefits. When we synchronized our breathing, and stared into each other's eyes it was magick. When we massaged each other, and took care of each other without any words we got closer. When we caved to our desires and went fully into the experience we felt free. And this was just the tip of the iceberg!
From this point on I was committed. I wanted to learn so much more. I had also been unemployed for over a year during the pandemic at this point. I applied weekly for jobs in all sorts of fields, and had found nothing that sparked even a single bolt of joy in me. I was very keen on what I didn't want to do with my life. I knew that I didn't want to sell medical equipment, or manage a retail store, or work for a corporation. I knew so many things that I didn't want to do, that when an opportunity arose that sparked all sorts of joy. passion and purpose, that it was right. I had found the path to becoming a tantra teacher.
I mulled over it for about a day. When I woke up the next morning it was the first thing on my mind. I could feel the choice in my body. I was lead to the choice with my soul. It was crazy. I had only been doing tantra for a few months. How could something feel so positively in synch?! But I had just learned in tantra to stop asking why. Why is not so important. So I put the deposit down on a tantra teacher class in Greece that morning. And never once looked back.
I bought more books and found podcasts and videos about tantra. I dedicated myself to practicing everyday. I'm so proud of all I went through in these past 6 months getting ready for this course. It wasn't some cake walk with no obstacles or heart aches, either. In fact, I broke up with my girlfriend of 5.5 years, I found out I'm blind in my left eye, and my unemployment ended with me still jobless. All of these things could've derailed my plan if I was not committed. But I continued to make the choice for my higher self every day.
INSPIRED ACTION: Pick some random far-away goal. Like becoming a famous actress, or owning a restaurant, or even becoming a kitty. Something really out of line with what you are currently doing. Draw up a list of steps it would take to get there. Maybe the list is 5 steps. Maybe it's 10. However many steps it is, I want you to realize that your life can be completely altered by one committed choice followed by action to get there.