The sun shines so bright I squint to see. It reflects off the sweet blue Mediterranean waves, lapping at the solid stone shoreline. My eyes are wider than balloons and I step out onto the patio. THIS is what I will call home for 30 days. I can hardly believe it. A couple other students have congregated on our huge, shared patio overlooking the seawater pool. I walk up to them and exclaim "who else can't believe this?!". They all laugh, eyes wider than mine. We talk about tantra, the universe, leaving the real world behind, and the excitement we all share for this course. The next 30 days have so much in store for each of us. From the highs of week one, to the difficulties in week three, we all become closer than a family. All in the name of Tantra.
I still can't believe what we accomplished together in those paradise rooms. I felt more love for the universe than I'd ever felt. My heart opened. My mind cracked in half. My senses were bombarded with feelings from every angle. But it was the love I felt for each of those souls that really sticks with me. It's not so much about the workshops, then it is about the deep connection with others. Something I want to share with the whole world.
Once the mind is expanded past its original mold it cannot go back. And I never want it to. The feelings may level off, but the expansion of consciousness can't. I embodied what it truly meant to be tantric. If only for glimpses, sometimes. Each glimpse propelling the next glimpse, then the next. Until it all becomes an open ceremony of presence, heart, and connection.
In the beginning it was harder to attain for longer periods of time, but by the end of 30 magical days every workshop was a breakthrough. Every exercise a new pathway. Every lesson a new tool for healing. I hope to embody these as a tantra teacher myself.
So, what does it mean to be a tantra teacher? Is it about how much knowledge you can attain? Is it about how well you can put together a workshop? Is it about reaching enlightenment? How good your sex is? I don't think so. Being a tantra teacher means you can create a space where people can heal, grow, connect, and love. And you do it in total presence and heart.
I'm ecstatic to share this power with you. It's already changed my life. I react less to circumstances. I am more kind, understanding, and self-aware. I can commune with the universe more fully as a witch. I can feel the bliss of the energy all around us. I am so much more grateful. I can connect fully with others, and more importantly, myself. This is my dream for you.
After I left the training, I travelled to Amsterdam, then Germany. Then I decided to visit my family in my hometown in Delaware. I was immediately confronted with the previous reality I once held. The slushing routines I saw everyone play out. The absence of presence. The search for something more, but not knowing where to find it. The juxtaposition of these two lives was jarring. It held up a mirror, yet again, to my life. To choose between these options. The sparkling blue waters of the Mediterranean, or the muddy waters of the Atlantic. And I'm doubling down on my path towards tantra. Join me.